Don't You Hate it When You Accidentally Buy Maternity Clothes?

Well, don't you?

Oh, you say that's just me?

Of course it is.

Clearly I didn't look at the label. Sewn right into the back of the neck, like all other shirt labels: "Cozy Maternity." Right there in the brand name!

I even tried it on! It was a little blousey, but that's the fashion these days. You know, form-fitting at the top and a little loose and free around the mid-section, like a lot of tops that are popular in the regular, NON-maternity sections of all the stores. They're really quite flattering, you should get one (of if you're a guy, get one for your girl). Wait, are you going to take fashion advice from ME? The girl who wears maternity clothes and is definitely, no way, no how, not possible, not even a little pregnant?

Hey Lazy Ass

I live in a cute little apartment complex called Bellemeade in a cute little suburban town called Leesburg. At the center of our small complex is the leasing office and the mail center. All apartment mail is delivered here, neatly deposited in each respective mail box. It is really quite cute and organized, well-planned and convenient

The mail center is centrally located, so just a short walk from wherever you are on the Bellemeade property. I say a short walk, but for most of my neighbors it's more of a short(er) DRIVE.

For some reason almost everyone drives to pick up their mail. They cannot possibly be expecting large packages every day. And while the mail center has a convenient location, it does not have parking to accommodate a large numbers of cars. But people don't take that as a sign that they should hoof it the, oh, ten steps to get the mail. They decide it's perfectly acceptable to just stop their cars as close to the mail center that they can get.

As you might imagine, it quickly becomes a cluster f.

Unfortunately I have to drive right by the mail center to get to my apartment. (As an aside, I always drive straight to my apartment, park out front of my apartment, walk from my apartment to the mail center then walk back to my apartment - notice a theme?) But when there is a back-up of cars haphazardly "parked" in the middle of the lane, I have to wait in the makeshift parking lot. Wait, while the lazy asses put their cars in park. Wait, while the lazy asses mosey to their mail boxes. Wait, while the lazy asses flip through their mail (we couldn't wait until we were home to inspect??) Wait while the lazy asses putz back to the car, almost getting struck by multiple vehicles (belonging to the other lazy asses who have already successfully retrieved their mail and are now fleeing the scene).

I could maybe understand driving to get the mail if it was snowing, pouring rain, sleeting, negative 20 degrees outside. Or if you stop one day because the mail center is on your way to/from your apartment and you are expecting a large package and you're on crutches (yes, all of these conditions must be simultaneously present). But really, this is getting out of hand. A little stroll to the mail box won't kill ya. Come on, lazy ass.